And all through the house...

Some quiet moments here at home...

I've been collecting friendly little forest animals for a few years. 

They're living around the base of our tree this holiday season.

Some are realistic...

...some are silly.

I was thinking of something Gwen said.  (The super generous woman that sent us the package of woodland goodies.) She said that as a child, she and her mother would take long walks through the woods. Her mother would let Gwen bring home her 'finds', and spread them out on a cookie tray. They were allowed to keep their special things in empty egg cartons.

Here's a butterfly we found last week.  Although I miss wintery weather, one perk of living so far south is that we still have butterflies this late in the year.  Or at least, we're still finding their delicate bodies.

I love that image...little girl Gwen with her leaves and stones and branches, spreading them out like the treasures they truly are.  To her, that pine cone was as precious as an emerald.  Taking her time, picking her favorites to pack away in those soft styrofoam bowls.

I was touched by the gift of slowness.  Children need that, I think.  To a tiny person, the ability to walk slowly, look around, not rush, take time to process things...that's important. 

Since Violet is so precocious, I sometimes forget that she's as young as she is.  You can tell by looking at her sweet face that there is a lot going on in that mind.  The clogs are turning.  Yet...she's still so fresh and new.  She needs time.  Time to think, time to watch, time to learn, time to just be.

Obviously, as a parent, you can't always do that.  You can't spend 3 hours at the grocery store, you can't walk slowly through the freezing cold rain and drench the baby, you can't stop making dinner and play Memory for two hours.  Things have to get done.  I get that. 

Yet...I can conciously try to set aside more time, so we don't have to rush.  I can get up half an hour earlier so that I don't pester her to hurry and eat her breakfast.  I can schedule more time so that I'm not snappy while trying to get through my errands.  I can  remember to linger on that walk, if that's what she needs.

I'm going to try to let that guide me this winter...slowing down.  Giving the girls the time they need.  Letting them set the pace sometimes.  How do you slow things down?  What's working?  What isn't?  I'm curious how you all make more time in your lives.  Even if it's just 'eat off paper plates so we skip washing the dishes', let me know what works for you and your family.

Comments

[Dusti Harlan]

First off, I love your tree and woods critters.
Walking through the woods and admiring intently were big with us growing up; even both my parents, in different ways.
I'm not a parent so, grain of sand and all. It IS important and some do it better than others but we should all have this awareness of it.
My Dad excelled in this but you know, Moms generally spend many fold the time shuffling kids absolutely everywhere with them and it IS hard to set aside the extra time.
I imagine you being particularly good at this Laura!

[Laura Irrgang]

Thanks, Dusti. I know you and Brandi have such a healthy appreciation for all things natural and aesthetically pleasing. Including roadkill. I DO try to do these things with Violet (and eventually with Piper) but I always feel like Im forgetting things. It really helps to live in the boonies, though-cant help but see these things all around us every day.

[Marty]

I love the idea of "slowing down" with parenting. The older two kids are in preschool, and I definitely feel like things are more hectic the days they go to school, which is Monday through Wednesday. But then, maybe that's just because they go to school back to back...so it's literally "drop off-pick up-drop off-pick" in a span of a few hours.

I just checked out a book from the library called "Fed up with Frenzy: Slow Parenting in a Fast-Moving World" by Susan Sachs Lipman. I haven't read it yet, but the idea of slowing down is definitely something that's been on my mind.

[Laura Irrgang]

Sounds like a good book, Marty.
Im going to request it through our inter-library loan.
Do you have that at your library?
Saves me a ton of money on books I want to read
but dont necessarily need to own.

Oh---and Im totally going to be doing the back to back
preschool thing in a few years.
Let me know if anything helps with that transition.

From:

[Jill James]

Hi Laura! Where did you put your Victorian foxes? Did you name them?

Do you like Tasha Tudor? I adore her.....She has a book "Forever Christmas" you would love.......

I won't go on about this, but it took me almost 6 years and many surgeries to have a baby.....my pet peeve was hearing parents say, "Hurry Up"....

There is a fabulous book "The Happiness Project" and the author is definitely a minimalist type A ~ and I'm a wanna be hoarder who reigns myself in (& not very well) type B ~ BUT it was #1 on the NY Times bestseller list. She has a new one "Happier at Home" but so far I don't like it as well. New moms & not so new moms should read it.....and get a crockpot! That thing saved me because my daughter lived at ballet.

One of the reasons I love your blog, Laura.....is you seem to take time to really live. (and you pose roadkill !!)

You are a Cancer and we Cancers rock the casbah when it comes to motherhood. The real test is how to not over-smother.

What worked for me was not to react to every little thing. I used rewards & not punishment. Plus, I wanted to have a 2nd childhood myself! I kissed them all the time. Everything is magic to them. When you get right down to it, having fun with them is important. When you look back, that's all you'll have.......

[Laura Irrgang]

Oh, Jill...what a lovely comment---thank you!
Im going to respond privately.