Ew.

(photo from OddAnimals)

I got pooped on by a pigeon.  And when I say pooped on, I mean pooped on.

I ate breakfast at IHOP, a pancake chain-do you have those where you live?  They have a giant sign that pigeons were sitting on, and I stupidly parked under it. 

I was holding Piper in the front seat, and had the windows down.  I started hearing these loud, sticky thumps on the roof and thought, "Is somebody throwing something at my car?"  Then, nasty pigeon poo poo started sliding down my front and back windshields. 

Then.  Oh...I shudder even now thinking about it.  Then...a big plop landed on my passenger arm rest and splattered all across the inside of the car.  It landed on my baby and in my mouth!  And between my seats, and in my open purse.  I was horrified.

I scrubbed at my mouth with wet wipes and tried to clean Piper up.  When I got out of the car to put the baby in the car seat, another pigeon pooped all down my back.  At least I had a sweater on so I could take it off.  I want to to bleach my mouth.  It was so, so, sooooo disgusting.

My friend Vanessa said, "Laura. You should be happy that pigeon pooped in your mouth.  It's good luck.  It means you're about to make a lot of money."

All right, then.  I actually bought a lottery ticket.  Now I'm going to go brush my teeth again.  For about the 15th time.

P.S.  IHOP's pumpkin pancakes are back on the menu for fall.  Even after the pigeon yuckiness, I still think they're yummy.

Comments

[Jill James]

OMG! At least you had already eaten your pumpkin pancakes! But, still......OMG!

[Vanessa {a fanciful twist}]

Hahaha! Well - all birds pooping on you are crazy good luck.

Once a bird pooped on me, and my client was with me as I freaked out.

Then she said, stop stop! This is good luck, you are going to make a lot of money is year. And I DID!! A TON!! Real estate.

Then I spent it all :)

Now, I am waiting for a bird to poop on me again. Darn.

[Laura Irrgang]

Hey Vanessa-
I know where you can find a bunch of pigeons!

[Charlotte]

Vanessa said what??!! Honey, I cannot imagine the gross factor. Not enough wet-wipes at WalMart to cleanse me. So glad you survived!

[Stacy Ross]

See!!!! I told you it was good luck!

[Lisa Muncy]

OMG! I would die! My baby and me would get scrubbed down, and whatever it landed on in my purse would get THROWN OUT! Bleach, bleach, bleach!!!! But on a serious note, keep an eye on any strange symptoms(not sure what they are) because bird crap can carry diseases. . .so I heard, I'm thinking the hanta virus? Not trying to scare you or make you paranoid, just want you to be aware! BTW, no amount of money would be worth that pigeon doo-doo!!!

[Laura Irrgang]

No joke, Lisa.
Ive used hydrogen peroxide and tons of Listerine.
Its funny you mentioned diseases....I stayed up half the night looking up diseases you can get from contact with birds.

Nasty, nasty pigeons!